


You

by thecursedlady



Series: You [1]
Category: Real Person Fiction
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-13 17:09:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28531971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecursedlady/pseuds/thecursedlady
Summary: You walk through the door and look me directly into my eyes. I look down, not wanting to meet your gaze. I am afraid that it will break me. Your voice breaks the silence, and I meet your gaze for the first time in months. It’s overwhelming. Your eyes are fascinating. A green forest in autumn, with a hint of brown in them. Your skin is light, nearly translucent. So much that I can spot the scar on your mouth, that I have kissed so often, immediately.
Series: You [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2090094
Kudos: 1





	You

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone :), 
> 
> today I’m letting you all into my personal space. This One-Shot is about myself and a person close to my heart. It is not really fiction, but in a way, it is. Anyway.. I hope you like it.

**𝚈𝚘𝚞**

  
You walk through the door and look me directly into my eyes. I look down, not wanting to meet your gaze.

I am afraid that it will break me. 

Your voice breaks the silence, and I meet your gaze for the first time in months. It’s overwhelming. Your eyes are fascinating. A green forest in autumn, with a hint of brown in them. Your skin is light, nearly translucent. So much that I can spot the scar on your mouth, that I have kissed so often, immediately.

You are saying you missed me and I let the words heal my heart little by little. I can tell you are as nervous as I am. Maybe ashamed even. Ashamed, that you have not messaged me in so long. I am not angry at you, I tell you. Pulling you towards me. Taking you into my arms. Your heartbeat is fast and irregular and I am wondering if it’s me that doing this to you. Are you as intrigued by my smell as I am by yours? And then we break into a laugh. A laugh that’s honest and forgiving and I know I am home.

We lie down into my bed. You are only wearing your boxer shorts whilst I am still fully dressed. I am too afraid. Maybe you will finally realize that you really don’t like my body at all, or that I’m not as pretty as you thought in the subtle light of the sunrise. All of that goes trough my mind while you pull me deeper into your arms, whispering in my ears how much you love my scent. How much of an idiot you were. I missed you, I missed you, I missed you, you’re repeating it over and over again, like a mantra.

Instead of answering, I let my lips meet yours and you kiss me like a drowning man. You kiss me as though there is nothing more important than kissing me. Like we’ve never been not kissing our whole life’s. Deep down I know though. I know that if I let you out of my door again, I will be waiting for you again. Again. And again.

Sometimes for days and sometimes for months and hopefully not for years.

You undress me and your eyes scan over my body like it’s the first time that they see me naked. Like I am something Picasso drew and you are a art lover who wants to take it all in. All the imperfect perfections that I have. You kiss me again and when you finally put your dick into me, I moan. You fit so perfectly inside me it hurts. Like you were only made for me. As you push into me harder and harder and I am nearly screaming your name, you pull me into your arms again. Holding onto me like your life depends on it and nothing will ever come in between us. I am finally home and all my disturbing thoughts are flying away, getting replaced by only thoughts of you.

There are drops of sweat running down your back as I break the skin there with my nails. We are one.

After, we are heavenly breathing against each other, waiting for us to calm down so we can enjoy our cigarette in bed. I tell you that you’re the only one I ever done that with and you laugh as if you don’t believe me. But it’s true. I never hugged after sex. I never held onto someone so much I felt like dying when I didn’t.

And as you slowly drift to sleep in my arms I am happy. Your hand is lazily playing with my breast, but I can’t tell if you are doing it consciously or not. Your breath on my neck is warm, it’s tickling a little. You open your eyes and with your fingers you go over my face, my eyes, my nose, my lips. You ask me what I’ve been up to and I want to tell you so many things at once, but I don’t. I tell you, nothing. How about you? And you tell me about all the stress you have at work and the fears you have for your mother. I understand you, so I just hold you closer to me. Our fingers are playing with each other.

I begin kissing your lips, your neck, your stomach, going deeper and deeper. You let a moan escape as I slowly move my tongue around your tip. Your fingers are pulling my hair and before I can really begin you pull me up, making me sit on top of you, your dick easily sliding into me again. Home, I think.

As you fuck me, you look into my eyes. I know that you don’t want to miss anything. You once said, you liked watching me come undone.

It’s getting brighter outside, our phones are constantly buzzing with new notifications it seems, but we simply ignore it. You tell me that you don’t want to waste time on your phone when you are with me, but part of me wonders if you just don’t want me to read some message i am not supposed to see. I feel like I know you so well, but on the other side.. I don’t.

What are your biggest fears? Who would you die for? Did you also want to become an astronaut or a police officer when your were younger? I want to ask you these things. But I don’t. There is always a next time. I don’t know when. But I know this is not the last time I see you.

Are you fucking other girls on the days we don’t see each other? Will you kiss someone else at midnight on New Year’s Eve? I won’t. I will be waiting for you.

You pull me out of my thoughts with kissing me and tickling me at the same time. I laugh and you watch me closely. Did you know, that you look like you want to run in front of a train, when you are lost in your thoughts?, you ask and I shake my head no, smiling. Your voice is so soft and yet so manly. I could listen to you talk for hours and hours to no end.

Raindrops are falling onto my window and for a second I wish it was snow. Do you want to watch a movie? A cup of coffee? You say yes to both and for the first time in my life I stand up naked and walk into my kitchen, not bothering to get dressed. You make me feel safe. I tease you about how much sugar you take in your coffee and you tell me to shut up, but your eyes tell me you don’t want that. I lay back into bed and you tell me how beautiful I am. How hot. How smart. I kiss you again, not having the strength to stop. 

We loose ourselves in each other again, the coffee on the bookshelf already cold. We change our position, so we can hold each other and watch the movie, too. Halfway through the movie you ask me, what we are watching and I laugh loudly and free. I tell you that I don’t know, I can’t focus. You smile sheepishly and for a minute I can’t breath. How beautiful you are. Oh, you are driving me insane.

But, unfortunately, you always have to leave at some point. I wish, you could stay. Let us stay in our little bubble for a little longer. I can not lose you again, I want to beg. Please.

I don’t tell you that, though. I tell you, I will not wait. That you have to give me something in order for me to let you in again. You know as well as I am, that I am lying. Maybe you don’t want to keep me waiting, maybe you do miss me as much as I miss you when we are not together. Maybe life really keeps getting in the way.

Am I the only one who wished it didn’t? That the feeling, that time stops when we are together is not only a feeling but reality. However, it is reality. And so I have to watch you get dressed. Watch you as you take your things. Feel you as you give me one long kiss. Hearing you say that you don’t want to go but you must. And I nod, telling you I understand. Telling you to write me soon, both knowing that it’s probably not going to be soon. Even as we miss each other.

The door closes behind you and I want to shout I love you. I don’t. It’s stuck on the tip of my tongue and I wash it down with cold coffee. I get dressed, too. Because now that you’re gone again I am so much colder. With silent tears running down on my cheeks I make myself a cup of tea, while smoking a cigarette. I see the bus drive by, see you taking a seat and the moment feels like forever.

I beg you to look up at me one more time. You don’t hear my thoughts.


End file.
